Dog Food

The dog loves to eat but I’m not sure if she knows what she’s getting herself into.

The husband brings home about a dozen crabs after a day of fishing. There’s not enough for ALL of us

The dog thinks she’s going to have dinner with us. We cut off the dog’s head again!

I thought cats were curious. Love the furrowed brow.

That crab can really do some damage to that cute little nose.

It’s a little close for comfort. We save the dog from a confrontation I know she would lose by bringing the crabs in the house to steam.

Oh no.

Me Against The World

This was the very first crab we caught. He’s a blue crab. See his little blue legs? This picture caused the girl to say ”Mom, you’re like a real photographer!” It was the best compliment I ever had.

We were awed by him. He was so cute. Then we ate him. With Old Bay.

My Daughter Ashley Rae – Or Not

Well, no, she’s not my daughter. But she looks an awful lot like me. Ashley came to live with Neighbor Yvonne and family four years ago. Ashley is from China which makes her my daughter? Well no, never mind.

While on vacation with Ashley and her family a couple of years ago, I had this epiphany that, well, she looks like me. She was giving her real mom a hard time in the lobby of the hotel where we stayed. You know; kicking, screaming, biting, standard. Neighbor Yvonne had her hands full. I was letting the scene play out and I stood by; placid, detached and buffing my nails. I eventually realized that I was getting quite a few disapproving looks from passer-bys. I thought it strange that I was garnering so much attention, was there spinach in my teeth? Were my nose hairs showing?

I then realized that I was holding Ashley’s stroller with her diaper bag on my shoulder. Aaaaahhhh, they thought I was the mom and I was letting the nanny beat my child. I was happy to beat her myself but it’s not morally correct to beat someone’s else child, just your own. So the irony of it struck me and I start to smile to myself. Then I realized, that I was standing by; placid, detached, buffing my nails and smiling, while holding Ashley’s stroller and with her diaper bag on my shoulder, as the nanny beat my child. It was delicious.

Ashley turned five last July and is a little lady now. She doesn’t bite anymore. I didn’t make her birthday party because I was going out of town. I felt guilty that I never bought her a gift. Even though she’s not my child, I have very strong maternal instincts toward her and the husband is on standby with a shot gun when she becomes a teenager.

It made it worse when Neighbor Theresa came over and said, “Oh is that the dress I got you for your birthday? It looks so cute on you!” La di da.

Well, Ashley, I’ll get you a nicer dress that will cost much more than what Neighbor Theresa got you.

Meow

This is just the cat. It has nothing to do with yesterday’s post. You know – women – catty. Never mind, I had to explain it to the husband too. Moving on…

See that tooth? Well I used to have one like that. People would sometimes say, I was a Pretty Girl, but I knew they were lying. They just felt sorry for me because I had a tooth that stuck out of my mouth like John McCain at a Madonna concert. Sorry for the bad metaphor. Every time I smiled, I looked like I was going to eat the person I was in conversation with. So I didn’t like to smile. I didn’t like to get my picture taken. I’m a warped adult because of that tooth.

My parents never got me braces and I don’t hold it against them – all the time. So at the ripe age of 33, I got braces. It was such a pivotal time that I still tear up when I think about it. I’m fixed! My life is perfect because my teeth are perfect.

So to spare my kids from becoming warped adults, they both have metal. And I’m going to get the cat’s tooth pulled, because I don’t want him to be warped either. Though I’m not sure if he cares. He would eat us if he could.

That being said, the husband married me before I got braces. But he’s a special guy, and blind…he’s a blind pilot. I can’t tell you what a wonderful guy he is. He makes me tea every night.

Just another confession on the world wide web.

So knowing all this…name this picture.

Desperate Housewives September Edition

This may be predictable but the song in my head is “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun” by Cyndi Lauper.

For the last four years, our neighborhood gets together once a month at each other’s homes to play bunco. There are 16 of us. Although we have had people leave the group and we’ve added new players, the majority of the group has remained together. This is not stepford wives stuff. We have an engineer, a veterinarian, a government worker, a small business owner and several teachers - among others. All of us are or were housewives. And we’ve all been desperate at one time or other I’m sure. The reason I believe this group has stayed together for so long is that we like each other. It’s that simple. We all know why we get together, community is important to all of us.

My neighbors are the nicest people. Really. Our little town should be in Money Magazine’s best places to live. It’s because of the people who live here. You can’t find that in any MLS listing anywhere.

We take the summers off so this is the first time we’ve met since May. We are very happy to see each other.

My guy friends and the husband will sometimes rib me. One guy actually took the time to explain the history of bunco to me. Because he’s like that.

It actually started back in England during the 18th century. It was introducted to the US in 1855 by a crooked gambler during the Gold Rush. It became a form of organized gambling and an efficient way of separating hard working citizens from their money in establishments called Bunco Parlors. Yikes.

Hence, the word Bunco came to be a general term that applied to all scams, swindling and confidence games. Oh my.

Through the Victorian era and prior to WWI, Bunco had achieved permanent placement as a traditional family or parlor game, promoting social interaction.

During this period Bunco groups consisting of 8-12 people and as many as 20 people enjoyed an evening of food, drink, conversation, and friendly competition.

During prohibition and the roaring 20’s, the infamous Bunco gambling parlors resurfaced in various regions of the US. The most notorious speak-easies and Bunco dice parlors were located in and around Chicago, Illinois.

The term “Bunco Squad” referred to the detectives who raided these establishments! Hands up lady!

After prohibition, Bunco group activity declined in the major cities of the country, but spread to the suburbs as housing developments and the migratory population expanded nationally. Probably because the suburbs found ways around the prohibition rules.

Since the early 1980’s Bunco group activity has increased due to a combination of circumstances; a return to traditional family values , a sense of neighborhood and community and the desire and need for social interaction. Thank you Ronald Reagan.

And we have great prizes.

I will look out the window next month for the Bunco Squad. Especially since it will be at my place!

I’ll also explain the chicken next month. By the end of the night, it was no longer called a chicken. I used Get Totally Rad’s Super Fun Happy action on all of these photos. Because it was that kind of night.

Thanks Tim for the history lesson.

The Ghost of Mary Harrison

My kids claim that the auditorium in their school is haunted. They say the namesake, Mary Harrison, fell from the balcony and died. I was at an assembly and snapped this photo, which they claim is proof that Mary’s ghost is wandering the aisles.

Is this her ghost? Or is it just bad photography? Tell me what you think. Go ahead, leave a comment. The least that can happen is that you offend me and I’ll never speak to you again. You decide…hey, I heard that.

Dogfight In Four Color Adjustments

So the boy decides that he’s going to take on Kiji. Kiji belongs to Neighbor Suzanne and family. They were out of town for the weekend so Kiji stayed with us for a while. We love it when she visits, she plays more than the dog does. This is bad composition but I love the boy’s face…”Com’on, lets fight.”

I was trying to stay out of the way and save myself, therefore the bad camera angle. I boosted the red in this picture by going to Enhance>Adjust Color>Color Variations in Photoshop Elements. I then clicked Increase Red one time. It made my cabinets look really good!

 

Ouch, Kiji seems to have the upper hand. See the pain in the boy’s face?

I ran auto contrast, auto level and auto color correction in Photoshop Elements. Trust me, it helped. There was a lot of action going on.

Now the boy’s got his second wind.

Yes, those are my oven mitts.

The boy lands a right hook to Kiji’s face. Ouch that must hurt. I sharpened this picture a little bit, do you see the grain in the cabinets? I didn’t boost the red in this picture, can you see the difference between this one and one before it?

The boy’s the victor by TKO.

These pictures were really pretty bad. But some patience with Photoshop really snazzed them up. At least you can see the play by play.

Do you think Neighbor Suzanne will let Kiji come stay with us again? We take good care of our guests, really.

Love In Three Color Adjustments

This this straight out of the camera (SOOC) love. The girl and Baby are very close, Baby sleeps in her room every night.

I sharpen this picture in Photoshop Elements. Why I’m using Photoshop Elements on my old computer  rather than Photoshop 6 on my new computer is still a very sensitive subject and I’d rather not talk about it right now. I bumped up the red in Enhance>Adjust Color>Color Variation. Just a little. It definitely warms it up.

In this one, I did an Auto Contrast, Filter>Sharpen>Unsharp Mask. The setting were 98%, radius 1.5 pixels and threshold 8 level. I think it was because I’m a bad photophrapher. Anyway, I think this is my favorite setting. The light is golden and the girl’s hair is really shiny. Baby didn’t move the whole time. He’s a good, lazy kitty.

I have to say that learning Photoshop Elements has not been a bad thing. One day, I’ll tell you what happened to my new computer. It’s still too soon and I may still need therapy.

 

Lobster Attack

I grew this boy in my womb.

I didn’t coin the phrase but it’s what I think every time I see an antic like this.

He survived the lobster attack by the way. He lived to fight with his sister another day.

Let Us Remember…

…how great this country is. Especially today.

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