I’ve Been Distracted

There is nothing – nothing cuter than a bunch of boys who love each other. That kind of camaraderie is found in rare environs like, fighter squadrons, ministry groups and – wrestling teams.

Since my car accident last November, my mind has been in a fog – I found it hard to jump start my creativity and a sinking fear started to sink in – the fear that teenagers are joining twitter – and becoming my friends on Facebook – and finding that there is content on this blog about them.

And as I sit here I realize that I stand behind every typo-ridden post.

Behind every complaint about teenage uncleanliness, obstinate position, unfortunate decision making and general I-want-to-tear-my-hair-out confrontation is this – I love them and in every truce we make, I want them to know that.

Last night was Senior Night for the wrestling team and if how I felt after that ceremony is any indication of how I’ll be during graduation, then get ready for some raw emotion like you’ve never seen before.

The boys in the photo with me above are some that I love fiercely and the events of the last couple of weeks have been tough on them, their team, their coach and especially their parents.

I won’t go into detail but there was some behavior from some boys on the wrestling team (not pictured above) that caused ejection from the team, suspension from school and general disappointment from everyone.

Everything is good now – justice was imposed, grace was bestowed, humility reigned and did those boys ever learn a lesson -

Tonight was the boy’s last mandatory practice and on the way home I asked how he felt.

He said it was bittersweet and that there was a lot that happened in that gym over the last three years. We reflected on the events of the last few weeks, from the lowest lows to well – an acceptance that once we do what we feel is right, the outcome is ultimately out of our hands.

The boy said it was an experience worth having, that he learned not only about wrestling the sport – but life in general – like when his coach made him wear a belt, or when he shaved for the first time, courtesy of his coach – or in this latest incident, how to accept the consequences for the decisions one makes. I was so proud of how he handled himself among his team mates. I can’t find the words to tell you.

He’s special. Then we went to get his hair cut. And I finally can quit nagging about his hair.

The end.

My Introvert

As a child, my sister was extremely shy. So much so that she refused to go to school without me and since we were only 15 months apart, my mother held her back one year so that she would feel more comfortable starting school with her sister. Therefore, we were always together, had the same friends, and took the same classes. I’m not sure if it helped her to develop more self-confidence but it was nice to always have someone with whom to hang out – until of course our high school years when I started craving my own identity.

I’ve often wondered how things would have been for my sister had she started out on her own – independent of her security blanket.

Would she have been like my girl? Fiercely independent, calmly confident, secure in her own skin.

They are very much alike my sister and my girl. Both are extremely shy – some would say painfully so. I encourage the girl to always look adults in the eye and acknowledge their greetings. I tell her she doesn’t need to have a conversation but should always answer when spoken to.

And she does – for the most part.

I find that shy people tend to make others unsure of themselves. I find it so with the girl – people will approach and then sometimes feel rebuffed. It’s not her fault or theirs, but admit I wish it was different sometimes. She does teach me a couple things about myself – one of which is that it’s ok to not be liked by everyone. I’m a pleaser, she’s not. It is one of the many ways that I know she is a better person than I am.

And then there are her friends – it’s funny how she picks ‘em – or they pick her in some cases.

They’re a hoot – the whole lot and kit and kaboodle of them. It’s a wonderful blessed thing.

For Wordful Wednesday.

Little People Are Better Than Big People

I will be praying quite hard for all the children of the world between the ages of 12.5 and 18. These are the formative years, the fragile period of time when the choices they make will impact them in all of their adult lives – if their parents let them live that long. Some things that have gone “down” last week, and yes, there’s been “drama” and yes, my kids have been involved. I won’t bore you with the details since every single parent out there experiences the same things at one time or another. However – I will say this, I am so proud of my kids and this brings me to the conclusion that I have realized long ago – that they are better people than I am for I would have not have made the same decisions at their age. I was much more prone to making things difficult for myself.

They are a blessing – no doubt about it.

So now . . . how to tell you without really telling you about it? Just a short two years ago I was able to write freely but now they are older and – well – care about how they are portrayed on the Internet by their mother.

Go figure.

I’ll find a way . . .

A Win!

My boy – he won his wrestling match last week…

Just thought I’d mention…I’m all about good news this week. Happy Wednesday!

Tim Tebow The Wrestler

How about that Tim Tebow huh? Whether or not you believe in the supernatural aspects of his faith, anyone can see that boy is special – or at least as special as the great football players that came before him. Only time will tell how the rest of his career will go but he gave quite a show last weekend!

Not to brag, but I have been in a playoff game of sorts. I’ve been competing for the most hours put in at the concession stand.

The boy has been busy with his wrestling commitments. That makes the rest of his family busy too. Unfortunately, I haven’t had much time to photograph but even if I did have all the time in the world, I would find it challenging to capture the true spirit of competition of high school wrestling. How do you capture the smell of sweat by the way?

These are little Tim Tebows in the making – that is – if Tim Tebow was a wrestler.

That little boy in the center front? He weighs 96 pounds with his back pack on.

Last Friday the boy went to school at 6:40 am, came home at 10 that night, left again at 7:30 the next morning then came home late that evening. I’m not kidding when I say these tournaments are long – I’ll say again, they are long.

Last weekend’s tournament was the third one this season.

This is how I watch my boy wrestle. Through the safety of bars or through the slits of my fingers.

Granted the boy hasn’t gotten a lot of mat time so we do a lot of sitting around.

As much complaining as I do about this – there are parents who invest much more time than I could ever consider doing. It’s really admirable because it’s our kids after all.

Sometimes I’ll read and sometimes I’ll pass the time photographing as much pain and agony as I can. I have quite a collection now – can’t wait to show you. But it will have to wait for a little later – there’s another meet tonight. Can’t wait…

Parenting For Dummies Advice Request

I hope you will help me with something I’m struggling with…a question as it were…for some reason, I’m searching for the right answer …

A couple of months ago the girl asked me if she could go see a horror movie with friends. This movie was rated R. And the friends (including the brother) were no older than 17 years old.

We said no and I think they went bowling instead or didn’t go. I can’t remember.

She asked me again last night to go see the movie, The Devil Inside. I researched it a little and saw it was rated R. The reviews said it was the typical horror movie, brutal violence, language and gratuitous sex.

Trust me – I’m not naive enough to think they haven’t seen a lot of this. I rented the movie Paranormal Activity for the boys one night – guilty.

Her argument -

“You’ve let me see rated R movies before.”

“I’m old enough. I’ll be fine.”

“I’ll be with (the boy.)”

“What if the other parents say we can go?’

My argument -

“Yes, you have seen R rated movies, but you’ve been with me.” – these movies include Speed (can you believe that’s rated R?) and Die Hard.

“You’re not old enough.” – and she’s not, at least according to the Motion Picture Association of America.

“The boy isn’t going either.”

But it was the last argument – the one about the other parents that got me thinking. What if I am too strict? That being said, I don’t know if other parents really did say yes or if that’s just a ploy to sway me.

It’s a stand-off.

Actually I already told her it wasn’t a good idea – but now I’m second guessing myself…I hate the word hate but I hate it when that happens.

What would you do? Help!

I know it’s Thursday but I’m posting on Wordful Wednesday… those parents will know what to do!

Another Milestone

The girl passed her learner’s permit test last week.

I’m not ready. I’ll say it again, I’m not ready.

She asked me that night if she could drive. I was just involved in an accident last month and we were down to one car. We just bought our second car last Christmas Eve eve, three days after she go her permit.

I’m not ready -

- so I said no.

She’s driven since and trust me, I wish I continued to say no – no – no – no…

Her license photo was awfully cute though…

What is going around here? Why is my life flying by so quickly?

The Girl’s Room – Best Christmas Gift Ever

Last Saturday night, while the husband and I were at a party, the girl cleaned her room. It’s a monumental occasion, worthy of note.

When we got home, she took us upstairs and it really was perfectly clean. We were so proud. We don’t know how long it will last so we savored the moment.

Yesterday, I walked down the hallway and tapped my toe on her door to peek in.

It looked like this – still perfectly clean, after more than three days!

We did a little remodel to open up some more space for her and Neighbor Jim did such a great job that I wanted to show you right away. However, there was still purchases to be made and furniture to move around for the perfect placement. And then there was the question of whether or not I wanted the state of uncleanliness to be posted all of the internet(s) and I certainly was not going to clean it myself in order to post the finished product. That’s just not reality.

So after almost a year – this is what it looked like then. Here’s what it looks like now.

She’s a Washington Capitals fan as well as a horse riding specialist.

Her closet was organized as well. Mothers everywhere dream of this – an organized closet!

Her ribbons were consolidated in one place, a shelf her uncle built for her. This is only a sample of her ribbons. After so many years of riding she has many strewn about the house. It’s getting pretty difficult to contain.

That’s it! No more riding until we find a place for all the ribbons. I put my foot down.

Speaking of organized. I was most happy with her dresser.

All the lotions and potions, jellies and jams and sunglasses were in order. And all of her hair appliances were actually turned off.

Grateful for the small things that could potentially become big things.

Her night stand – clean. Wonder what she’s reading.

A teenage read that’s on the New York Times Bestseller list. Good girl.

She was the division champion for last summer’s league and as a result, scored this director’s chair. It was the least organized item in her room but I’m not going to nit pick. After all, she’s the champion.

Which brings me to this point. No matter where she goes and what does from now on, there is one thing that will always define  her. She’s a horse girl. And that is a huge blessing.

She’ll have that and carry that all the rest of her life.

And her first love will not be her current “boyfriend”. But it is Joker, her first leased pony that she could call her own.

The bed spread is Pottery Barn Teen, on sale. The rug is also Pottery Barn, not on sale. The rug was a battle that I lost but it is cute so…

The curtain and lamp are Target specials. The dresser is from Regency Furniture. I bought her Christmas lights that she put on her window. They light up and blink and really cute. I love that she loves them.

The Washington Capitals sherpa blanket – from the Verizon Center, purchased after a pleading – please, please, please. She love fuzzy blankets – and she loves hockey.

The Precious Moments figurines and various knick knacks are courtesy of her Nanna. More ribbons as you can see. The art work on the floor was done by a friend of hers. I’ll have to get it framed. The purple Christmas tree was purchased a few years ago at Home Depot of all places. The little table was acquired at a garage sale at a friend’s house. She didn’t like it at first, but now she does. Mom wins.

I did fold her sherpa Capitals blanket but other than that, the room was as I found it. So nice, and the perfect Christmas gift for her mom.

A Milestone

Yesterday, I was informed that the boy was accepted into the first of four colleges he has/will be applying to.

This particular college is his first choice but because it’s the most expensive, it’s our (the husband and I) last choice. But he’s really happy and we’re happy for him. The college application process is so painful that I’m glad we are finally in the home stretch. I’ll tell you about it once I’ve recovered – in about 20 years.

We know the biggest fight is still to come and that is the money fight, but for right now, I’m happy and relieved for him.

He’ll be off to college next year, hopefully without the colander on his head. I can’t believe it – especially when I look at the above photo.

Join The Shepherds At Church

I love the people at my church, they really are a fun and crazy group – emphasis on crazy. However, God says all sinners should come to Him and what better place to be when you are in need of repentance, redemption or psychological help?

By the way – said last night, “Mom, I just read your blog where you said you told Chris’s mom that we should have dated.”

They don’t ever click over to my blog – except of course when I say something silly about them. She’s still talking to me…

Merry Christmas and a very happy Sunday to you!

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